On Memorial Day
I celebrate my father. A veteran of the Vietam War, infantry man in the Big Red One brigade that went out so early in the war most didn't know who they were fighting or where Vietnam was located. The war changed his life and, I believe, led to his death. He died last year from esophogeal cancer. Some suspect the chemicals used in the war (agent orange, for example) are linked to cancer. I know for a fact that the war changed my dad's life and that he probably would have led a much healthier life without the war. He told me about how he didn't smoke, but cigarettes were provided for the soldiers and they would take smoking breaks where everyone who wanted to smoke could go smoke under the shade while everyone else had to stand in line in the sun until they were done. That's when he began to smoke. The war traumatized him, led him to make poor decisions, shy away from committment and responsibility, and become an alcoholic. So, despite the fact that my father's name will not be added to any war memorial, I will celebrate his life and remember his passing every memorial day. Thanks to war.
Monday, May 29, 2006
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
It all went down in Chinatown
Actually, that title makes it sound more dangerous than it really was. I will say that I was worried about losing a child somewhere in San Francisco all day. Luckily, there were about as many parents chaperoning as there were kids, so I didn't have to worry too much.
We took Amtrack all the way there. It was really really nice! Although driving down to the Bay isn't all that bad, I think the train is my new favorite mode of transportation. And with all the parents, I didn't have to pay much attention to the kids. Plus, after we arrived in Emeryville and took the Amtrack bus to San Francisco, we got to eat lunch at a Cantonese restaurant in Chinatown. And then we went on this really neat tour and went shopping before coming home. I learned so much! I feel bad for Lan and Ashley because when they wanted to go to Chinatown when they came to visit me for spring break, I had no idea where to take them or what to tell them. Now I do! We learned about how it was founded, went to some markets (including a live food market), the fortune cookie factory, a medicine store with all sorts of herbal remedies (the tour guide made me stick out my tongue for everyone to analyze), and a buddhist temple. At the temple she made me think of a question (I asked about my trip to Hong Kong) and then I shook this can of sticks and the first one to fall out would give me my answer. Not as simple as you think because the stick only has a number that corresponds to an ancient Chinese poem that I have to then translate or else my students would get no homework for the rest of the year.
Luckily, I snuck back in later and had the priest (or whatever you call them) help me translate it. The answer as that a plum tree looks so bare in the winter, but if you wait until spring the fruit will blossom. Make of it what you will.
We took Amtrack all the way there. It was really really nice! Although driving down to the Bay isn't all that bad, I think the train is my new favorite mode of transportation. And with all the parents, I didn't have to pay much attention to the kids. Plus, after we arrived in Emeryville and took the Amtrack bus to San Francisco, we got to eat lunch at a Cantonese restaurant in Chinatown. And then we went on this really neat tour and went shopping before coming home. I learned so much! I feel bad for Lan and Ashley because when they wanted to go to Chinatown when they came to visit me for spring break, I had no idea where to take them or what to tell them. Now I do! We learned about how it was founded, went to some markets (including a live food market), the fortune cookie factory, a medicine store with all sorts of herbal remedies (the tour guide made me stick out my tongue for everyone to analyze), and a buddhist temple. At the temple she made me think of a question (I asked about my trip to Hong Kong) and then I shook this can of sticks and the first one to fall out would give me my answer. Not as simple as you think because the stick only has a number that corresponds to an ancient Chinese poem that I have to then translate or else my students would get no homework for the rest of the year.
Luckily, I snuck back in later and had the priest (or whatever you call them) help me translate it. The answer as that a plum tree looks so bare in the winter, but if you wait until spring the fruit will blossom. Make of it what you will.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Scandals at School
Returning from Indiana after graduation, both of my flights ended up being delayed. The backstory would be that after graduation week and all the early mornings and late nights, I was exhausted. So, when added to hours of waiting in the airport and arriving home around 11:30pm and getting to bed around 1:30am so that I could wake up at 6am, the following morning was not so pleasant. Still I showed up to school with a smile on my face and a sack full of trinkets and pictures to share with the students about my trip.
Quickly, the smile was washed away as my principal came in shortly after school had started and I sent the kids off to PE. She asked me about my trip, but cut me off and that made me think something was up. When she handed over my journal/notebook, I had an even better clue about what was up. You see, I use this particular notebook for a variety of purposes including journal writing, lists, notes, etc. I had some information written in that notebook about things I needed to do for the sub when I was gone and I had brought it in and, in my rush to leave, must have left the notebook behind by the computer or on my desk. Well, some kid found it (as a matter of fact, the wrong kid found it) and read it and shared it and talked about it to their parents. Some of the first entries contain notes with slightly scandalous information; not super bad or anything, but definitely inappropriate for my fourth graders. Well, from there rumors began to swirl about me bringing in my girlfriend and passing notes to her in class and kissing her in front of the students. Then some of the parents jumped on the opportunity to complain that I move too fast in my math lessons and wasn't addressing the needs of their kids. And basically a whole "let's get rid of Mat" movement started and I was completely oblivious.
At least until all this was dumped on me first thing in the morning on my first day back.
Resolution: calm the storm, dispell the rumors, (don't think the kids got an adequate punishment for starting rumors and invading my privacy), grit and bare it, counsel them about dealing with there feelings of loss of the perfect Mrs. Livesey (didn't exactly agree with this), and make the kids feel guilty for the trouble they caused. Many parents came out in support and a bunch of the kids (the ones with a conscience) did feel bad and wrote me some letters of apology and support and things are okay now. But it totally burst my bubble and ever since I've felt so much less motivated to do anything for them, as if I owe them nothing and I'm just waiting to get through the last few weeks. Some of their parents are the root of all their problems. That is all I will say.
An official introduction to one of the many joys of teaching.
Get me back in school! ;-)
Quickly, the smile was washed away as my principal came in shortly after school had started and I sent the kids off to PE. She asked me about my trip, but cut me off and that made me think something was up. When she handed over my journal/notebook, I had an even better clue about what was up. You see, I use this particular notebook for a variety of purposes including journal writing, lists, notes, etc. I had some information written in that notebook about things I needed to do for the sub when I was gone and I had brought it in and, in my rush to leave, must have left the notebook behind by the computer or on my desk. Well, some kid found it (as a matter of fact, the wrong kid found it) and read it and shared it and talked about it to their parents. Some of the first entries contain notes with slightly scandalous information; not super bad or anything, but definitely inappropriate for my fourth graders. Well, from there rumors began to swirl about me bringing in my girlfriend and passing notes to her in class and kissing her in front of the students. Then some of the parents jumped on the opportunity to complain that I move too fast in my math lessons and wasn't addressing the needs of their kids. And basically a whole "let's get rid of Mat" movement started and I was completely oblivious.
At least until all this was dumped on me first thing in the morning on my first day back.
Resolution: calm the storm, dispell the rumors, (don't think the kids got an adequate punishment for starting rumors and invading my privacy), grit and bare it, counsel them about dealing with there feelings of loss of the perfect Mrs. Livesey (didn't exactly agree with this), and make the kids feel guilty for the trouble they caused. Many parents came out in support and a bunch of the kids (the ones with a conscience) did feel bad and wrote me some letters of apology and support and things are okay now. But it totally burst my bubble and ever since I've felt so much less motivated to do anything for them, as if I owe them nothing and I'm just waiting to get through the last few weeks. Some of their parents are the root of all their problems. That is all I will say.
An official introduction to one of the many joys of teaching.
Get me back in school! ;-)
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Making Memories
Nashville!!!
It was so incredibly special. Filled with memories I will carry with me forever. I cannot tell you how much happiness, pride, and love I felt over the course of the week. I mean it was practically insane with a group of 14 including several kids and a few older folks as well, but we all had so much fun! The image that sticks with me is of Graduation night's dinner at Monell's as all 14 of us sat at one big table. Passing baskets and baskets overflowing with southern cooking, it was so striking to see us all together and how, despite the absence of my parents, I am so very well supported. It was a representation of my life and why I live it and the people that care about me and will be there for me no matter what. Knowing that there were all these people on top of many others that would have liked to be there but couldn't almost overwhelmed me. When Ii get stuck thinking that the world is out to get me, there are moments like those where I realize how blessed I actually am. I am truly blessed to have met, impacted, and been impacted by all the people in my life. Thank you for being a part of that.
It was difficult trying to see a lot of my Vanderbilt people because everyone was so busy, but I saw everyone at least for a little while. Thanks to Carol I had very fine accommodations for the first few nights at her house in Franklin. Then we moved into the condo which also was very nice, but slightly more crowded with about 11 of us all living under the same roof. We made it to the Parthenon, the Opryland Hotel, Bicentennial Mall park, Opry Mills Mall, the Cracker Barrel, and even a Waffle House...all of my favorite sights around town. Of course, I also got to show off my school a bit. I won a bunch of special awards which was really exciting. The big award I won was the Dorothy J. Skeel Award for outstanding professional promise in elementary education. My professor from student teaching, Cristina, gave a little speech about me and listed a lot of my activities and accomplishments and compared me to a quote about Pablo Picasso that said many people can turn the sun into a yellow spot, but it takes real imagination, genius and talent for inspiration to turn a yellow spot into the sun. She said I embody that and share it with my students. Then she talked about the hardships of the past year and how my parents would have been so proud and everyone was crying. That was a very special moment too. Everyone seemed to have a great time and I'm really grateful for being able to share this important experience with all of them.
Check out some photos from the trip that my brother took at the following link.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/brianespinosa/sets/72057594137721827/show/
It was so incredibly special. Filled with memories I will carry with me forever. I cannot tell you how much happiness, pride, and love I felt over the course of the week. I mean it was practically insane with a group of 14 including several kids and a few older folks as well, but we all had so much fun! The image that sticks with me is of Graduation night's dinner at Monell's as all 14 of us sat at one big table. Passing baskets and baskets overflowing with southern cooking, it was so striking to see us all together and how, despite the absence of my parents, I am so very well supported. It was a representation of my life and why I live it and the people that care about me and will be there for me no matter what. Knowing that there were all these people on top of many others that would have liked to be there but couldn't almost overwhelmed me. When Ii get stuck thinking that the world is out to get me, there are moments like those where I realize how blessed I actually am. I am truly blessed to have met, impacted, and been impacted by all the people in my life. Thank you for being a part of that.
It was difficult trying to see a lot of my Vanderbilt people because everyone was so busy, but I saw everyone at least for a little while. Thanks to Carol I had very fine accommodations for the first few nights at her house in Franklin. Then we moved into the condo which also was very nice, but slightly more crowded with about 11 of us all living under the same roof. We made it to the Parthenon, the Opryland Hotel, Bicentennial Mall park, Opry Mills Mall, the Cracker Barrel, and even a Waffle House...all of my favorite sights around town. Of course, I also got to show off my school a bit. I won a bunch of special awards which was really exciting. The big award I won was the Dorothy J. Skeel Award for outstanding professional promise in elementary education. My professor from student teaching, Cristina, gave a little speech about me and listed a lot of my activities and accomplishments and compared me to a quote about Pablo Picasso that said many people can turn the sun into a yellow spot, but it takes real imagination, genius and talent for inspiration to turn a yellow spot into the sun. She said I embody that and share it with my students. Then she talked about the hardships of the past year and how my parents would have been so proud and everyone was crying. That was a very special moment too. Everyone seemed to have a great time and I'm really grateful for being able to share this important experience with all of them.
Check out some photos from the trip that my brother took at the following link.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/brianespinosa/sets/72057594137721827/show/
Sunday, May 07, 2006
As one door closes, another opens...
I feel as if I'm running down a hallway of doors. As I pass through one doorway and the door closes behind me, I have only moments to adjust to the new environment before I come upon another doorway to pass through. It is an exciting time, but also difficult to keep up. I bring it on myself, of course. It is my coping mechanism. Still, it is easy to become disoriented and feel lost with all the doors.
I just closed the show. I am so so proud of my work in the play. It truly was the most challenging, but rewarding role I've had the opportunity to play. Someone even told me they were shocked to see me doing so many non-characteristic things (i.e. cursing, getting a tatoo on my a$$, being an asshole, throwing around a girl, being Texan- which really amounts to being Southern because I don't know the difference and I figure most Californian audience members won't either, etc.) I'll definitely miss the people I worked with. Despite some drama befitting a group of actors, we bonded very well and I became pretty close to some of them. I'll especially miss that creative workshop that challenged the both sides of your brain to coordinate with your whole body to create art. That experience and challenge is why I keep theater as a part of my life.
I just closed the show. I am so so proud of my work in the play. It truly was the most challenging, but rewarding role I've had the opportunity to play. Someone even told me they were shocked to see me doing so many non-characteristic things (i.e. cursing, getting a tatoo on my a$$, being an asshole, throwing around a girl, being Texan- which really amounts to being Southern because I don't know the difference and I figure most Californian audience members won't either, etc.) I'll definitely miss the people I worked with. Despite some drama befitting a group of actors, we bonded very well and I became pretty close to some of them. I'll especially miss that creative workshop that challenged the both sides of your brain to coordinate with your whole body to create art. That experience and challenge is why I keep theater as a part of my life.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
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